Review: Catherine - A Risque Story That Needed More Risk

The following review may contain NSFW language/material and/or Spoilers for the Story and/or Mechanics of any part of this game. If you would like it to remained unspoiled, skip past the break and scroll to the conclusion.

A rum & coke to help me with these block puzzles

The premise for Catherine seems to come right out of the mind of @petermolydeux, the Molyneux twitter imposter: A game where fast-paced Zelda block pushing puzzles serve as a metaphor for the main character’s relationship issues. By drinking with his friends at the bar, he will be able to slowly articulate and, ultimately, progress in his relationship(s).

At least, that’s the ideal. The result is not quite so elegant nor as cohesive, but it hits enough of those points to remain interesting and entirely original.

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14.05.12

Pocket Guide To Yeti Sized Reviews

lol, Reviews

Game reviews have been a shit show since the whole “Gaming Journalism” began. And decades later, still no one has come close to perfecting it. Every site has a list of problems with their review structure, but they are never uniform. Some spend all their time describing the basics of the game then slap a number between 7-10 on it. Some offer great insight, but lack in keeping their reviews concise. Some axed numbered scores altogether, but don’t focus on distinguishing quality from game to game.

Why I’m saying this isn’t because I found the motherfucking Holy Grail of game review processes, but that nothing is perfect. My system is a little strange, but I find it the best way to express my opinions. So get it over it, learn the basics of it, and enjoy.

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26.03.12

*Cough*

March has been a quick month for me. With all the sickness, cleaning, work, appointments, and what not, I’ve put aside my writing for this site for other ventures in my little free time. Like Mass Effect 3. Oh what a mistake that was…

Finishing my game by Fall seems unreachable, so development will be slowed significantly once I start classes again. I’m not confident in showing it until further in development, but I will continue to write for this site until then.

I am currently planning a plethora of interesting articles, game mechanic breakdowns, and opinion pieces for your reading pleasure. I’m also going to try a few reviews. And by “a few”, I mean “I’ve got over a dozen planned, but we’ll see how this goes”.

Every year in March or April I look back at the best games of the past year. The extra few months give me time to catch up and gain some perspective. Since I already did the “ranked list with a 2-3 paragraph recap” already, I’m going for more free form. No ranking, no maximum number of titles, just the best damn 2011 games you can find.

Well, at least the ones I played. Sorry, The Witcher 2!

24.03.12

Wrap-up and Site Changes

The Top 20 Most Anticipated Games of 2012 (as decided by me) have been chosen and posted… as of a week ago.

A few who did read the list have given some feedback on the design of the posts. Namely that no one figured out that clicking the images would return them to the original list and that the “source link” would lead them to footage of the game. I’ll try to be less ambiguous in my post design choices in the future.

Between polishing those posts and being distracted by friends and video games, I added a few features to the site. I replaced the Twitter wrapper and it once again links to the correct tweets, rather than random ones. Endless scrolling has been added to the site, so no more flipping pages. Most importantly, Disqus has been added so commenting is now possible. In hindsight, I should have rolled that out before the multi-part opinion piece, but what’s important that it’s here now.

If you find any bugs or oddities with the site, I implore you to contact me. I’ll do what I can to fix it.

27.02.12
#1 - Journey
Journey and Fez seem to have been formed by giving the same single page design document to a multinational corporation backed art studio and a Montréal genius developer, as they share strikingly similar characteristics beneath the surface. Directionless, unconscious goals of overcoming the obstacles of a lonesome land. A sense of perfectionism that seeks an experience unique, yet flawless. A captivating art style and a breathtaking score, complimenting the end-product of genius design. Two games that will advance this young medium, if by only a few steps.
While Fez takes all of this and throws it into a twist on a familiar genre, the old-school puzzle platformer, Journey cannot really be defined by such conventions. You walk across vast dunes, searching ruins of lost cities and forgotten corners of the world. And that about wraps up the basic gameplay.
But whenever you see the game (or had your hands on it, if you played the beta), you thirst (HA!) for more. There is something… magically mysterious that draws you in. Shoot any 2 minutes of the game, slap it in a trailer, and I will begging to see more. It does this with words, quest objectives, or glowing paths. Journey instead feeds off of deep desires in our nature to provide motivation.
That desire is to seek what is out there beyond the confines of the familiar. To peer over that dune, in those great caves, through the ruins, and see new faces. They may not know you, they may not even acknowledge you, but you know they are there for the same reason. They too leave for the unknown and journey upon their own path.
Status: Released.

#1 - Journey

Journey and Fez seem to have been formed by giving the same single page design document to a multinational corporation backed art studio and a Montréal genius developer, as they share strikingly similar characteristics beneath the surface. Directionless, unconscious goals of overcoming the obstacles of a lonesome land. A sense of perfectionism that seeks an experience unique, yet flawless. A captivating art style and a breathtaking score, complimenting the end-product of genius design. Two games that will advance this young medium, if by only a few steps.

While Fez takes all of this and throws it into a twist on a familiar genre, the old-school puzzle platformer, Journey cannot really be defined by such conventions. You walk across vast dunes, searching ruins of lost cities and forgotten corners of the world. And that about wraps up the basic gameplay.

But whenever you see the game (or had your hands on it, if you played the beta), you thirst (HA!) for more. There is something… magically mysterious that draws you in. Shoot any 2 minutes of the game, slap it in a trailer, and I will begging to see more. It does this with words, quest objectives, or glowing paths. Journey instead feeds off of deep desires in our nature to provide motivation.

That desire is to seek what is out there beyond the confines of the familiar. To peer over that dune, in those great caves, through the ruins, and see new faces. They may not know you, they may not even acknowledge you, but you know they are there for the same reason. They too leave for the unknown and journey upon their own path.

Status: Released.

(Source: youtu.be)

23.02.12
#2 - Fez
Speaking about being in the public eye for way too long…
As my short memory may have clued you in, I tend to quickly find out whether I’m interested in a game then, just as quickly, I block out all information about it until its release. So when there was that giant lull of information about Fez, it had no effect. I was still anticipating without noticing its absence.
But I think what struck me about Fez is its passivity. Hardly the first game to go without conflict or enemies, it nevertheless makes Fez more welcoming. It’s a game that requires you to actively take in your surroundings, instead of forcing immersion through action. Fez establishes itself as a game about exploration of the possibilities of its world and its mechanics, not about achieving objectives through hallways.
After playing it at PAX last year though, I can no longer be apathetic to its per-release buildup. The game is polished to its core and I want to explore it. It is a craftsman’s lifework, wood smoothed by sandpaper of 4-digit grit. I want to hold in my hands, to see how smooth it has become.
I don’t know if Fez will succeed commercially, but I know that this is going to have critics and fans talking all year. Actually, I’m sure that Fez would be the Basion or Braid or Limbo of 2012 (that indie game that everyone talks about) if not for…
Status: Released

#2 - Fez

Speaking about being in the public eye for way too long…

As my short memory may have clued you in, I tend to quickly find out whether I’m interested in a game then, just as quickly, I block out all information about it until its release. So when there was that giant lull of information about Fez, it had no effect. I was still anticipating without noticing its absence.

But I think what struck me about Fez is its passivity. Hardly the first game to go without conflict or enemies, it nevertheless makes Fez more welcoming. It’s a game that requires you to actively take in your surroundings, instead of forcing immersion through action. Fez establishes itself as a game about exploration of the possibilities of its world and its mechanics, not about achieving objectives through hallways.

After playing it at PAX last year though, I can no longer be apathetic to its per-release buildup. The game is polished to its core and I want to explore it. It is a craftsman’s lifework, wood smoothed by sandpaper of 4-digit grit. I want to hold in my hands, to see how smooth it has become.

I don’t know if Fez will succeed commercially, but I know that this is going to have critics and fans talking all year. Actually, I’m sure that Fez would be the Basion or Braid or Limbo of 2012 (that indie game that everyone talks about) if not for…

Status: Released

(Source: youtu.be)

23.02.12
#3 - Gravity Rush
I actually had to watch gameplay footage to remind myself why I care about Gravity Rush, but immediately the intrigue, simplicity, and fluidity came flooding back to me.
I cannot describe what the game actually is; it would do the game a disservice. If I tell you the truth and say its a stylish light action game with gravity manipulation and mild RPG mechanics, you’ll laugh at me for being excited over such a minor title.
No, Gravity Rush is a game that requires video to be appreciated. It just has that… je ne sais quoi. No one is really paying attention to Gravity Rush except for those who are really into the Vita, which is shame. I think it will turn a lot of heads once it launches.
Status: To Be Released

#3 - Gravity Rush

I actually had to watch gameplay footage to remind myself why I care about Gravity Rush, but immediately the intrigue, simplicity, and fluidity came flooding back to me.

I cannot describe what the game actually is; it would do the game a disservice. If I tell you the truth and say its a stylish light action game with gravity manipulation and mild RPG mechanics, you’ll laugh at me for being excited over such a minor title.

No, Gravity Rush is a game that requires video to be appreciated. It just has that… je ne sais quoi. No one is really paying attention to Gravity Rush except for those who are really into the Vita, which is shame. I think it will turn a lot of heads once it launches.

Status: To Be Released

(Source: youtu.be)

20.02.12
#4 - Skullgirls
Skullgirls has been one of those projects that just has been in the public eye way too long, which is weird since the actual game was revealed less than a year ago. The game has been playable at every event imaginable and Reverge Labs has publicized more internal development changes than 5 years worth of titles.
So I’m actually starting to get sick of hearing about Skullgirls. I just want to play it, for christ’s sake. I just want to get my hands on it, spend hours in training mode, and take it online for a spin. Reverge, you convinced me to buy the game when you first started talking about your ingenius system design. All of the 60 fps matches, Castlevania composers, and bonkers character reveals are just making the wait harder. The fighting game community has already embraced Skullgirls and can vouch for its quality.
Just release the damn game.
( As an aside, I am actually concerned about the viability of Skullgirls down the line. The $10-$15 pricetag for the current state of this PSN/XBLA title is justified, but a smaller than expected roster and a few key missing features can only be supported with carefully priced and spaced DLC. Reverge will have their work cut out for them well after release… )
Status: Released

#4 - Skullgirls

Skullgirls has been one of those projects that just has been in the public eye way too long, which is weird since the actual game was revealed less than a year ago. The game has been playable at every event imaginable and Reverge Labs has publicized more internal development changes than 5 years worth of titles.

So I’m actually starting to get sick of hearing about Skullgirls. I just want to play it, for christ’s sake. I just want to get my hands on it, spend hours in training mode, and take it online for a spin. Reverge, you convinced me to buy the game when you first started talking about your ingenius system design. All of the 60 fps matches, Castlevania composers, and bonkers character reveals are just making the wait harder. The fighting game community has already embraced Skullgirls and can vouch for its quality.

Just release the damn game.

( As an aside, I am actually concerned about the viability of Skullgirls down the line. The $10-$15 pricetag for the current state of this PSN/XBLA title is justified, but a smaller than expected roster and a few key missing features can only be supported with carefully priced and spaced DLC. Reverge will have their work cut out for them well after release… )

Status: Released

(Source: gametrailers.com)

20.02.12
#5 - Professor Layton vs. Ace Attorney
Yeah, Capcom and I still have a love-hate relationship. But Level 5? We coo’. Yet despite how seemingly invincible Level 5 has been in the past 5 years, I have yet to spend time with the Layton series beyond mere introductions.
However, I know enough about Layton to understand this has the potential to be the best crossover since X-men vs. Street Fighter spawned the Vs. series. Both series live by their clever puzzles and can spin wonderful tales with strong characters, goofy situations, and witty dialogue.
Yet, it’s the two series compensating for the pitfalls of the other that make this marriage so perfect. Ace Attorney shines when you are in the courtroom, with the best cases spending a majority of the time there, but the investigations usually fall flat. While Layton has diverse and interesting puzzles, the flow of the game is entirely reliant on consistently cutting away to them.
By potentially giving the Layton a more focused experience and alleviating Ace Attorney’s boring investigations, Level 5 could make the perfect visual novel puzzler.
Status: ???

#5 - Professor Layton vs. Ace Attorney

Yeah, Capcom and I still have a love-hate relationship. But Level 5? We coo’. Yet despite how seemingly invincible Level 5 has been in the past 5 years, I have yet to spend time with the Layton series beyond mere introductions.

However, I know enough about Layton to understand this has the potential to be the best crossover since X-men vs. Street Fighter spawned the Vs. series. Both series live by their clever puzzles and can spin wonderful tales with strong characters, goofy situations, and witty dialogue.

Yet, it’s the two series compensating for the pitfalls of the other that make this marriage so perfect. Ace Attorney shines when you are in the courtroom, with the best cases spending a majority of the time there, but the investigations usually fall flat. While Layton has diverse and interesting puzzles, the flow of the game is entirely reliant on consistently cutting away to them.

By potentially giving the Layton a more focused experience and alleviating Ace Attorney’s boring investigations, Level 5 could make the perfect visual novel puzzler.

Status: ???

(Source: youtu.be)

20.02.12
#6 - Mass Effect 3
Bioware is not an infallible god, nor is this series exactly known for consistency. I surprisingly enjoyed Mass Effect 2 immensely, but it took a lot of convincing. As someone who found so little enjoyment in Bioware’s previous efforts (especially the first Mass Effect), it took a low pricetag and a half dozen friends to take the plunge.
(You may be thinking that I liked Mass Effect 2 so I only enjoy shooters, to which I point you to the rest of this list. It’s not the genre, it’s the quality of the experience.)
What helped Mass Effect 2 was that it wasn’t a resurgence of the PC RPG, but rather an evolution of the console shooter. It was what Epic wished they made and will probably copy in the future. Mass Effect 3 is really about whether Bioware has the balls to keep pushing that forward and the talent to keep everything in line.
Yet everything I read about Mass Effect 3 has me scared. Developed characters in the previous games seem to be tossed aside, their motivations flimsy at best. RPG mechanics are being thrown in left and right, seemingly a knee-jerk reaction to the second offering’s “fan” reception. 
Expectations are too high for this one, there is too much added and changed that Bioware risk removing or drastically altering the core of what made Mass Effect 2 so beloved. And I don’t think it could be repaired. This is the only game on this list that I am scared will fuck up, because it needs to be almost perfect to succeed.
Status: Released

#6 - Mass Effect 3

Bioware is not an infallible god, nor is this series exactly known for consistency. I surprisingly enjoyed Mass Effect 2 immensely, but it took a lot of convincing. As someone who found so little enjoyment in Bioware’s previous efforts (especially the first Mass Effect), it took a low pricetag and a half dozen friends to take the plunge.

(You may be thinking that I liked Mass Effect 2 so I only enjoy shooters, to which I point you to the rest of this list. It’s not the genre, it’s the quality of the experience.)

What helped Mass Effect 2 was that it wasn’t a resurgence of the PC RPG, but rather an evolution of the console shooter. It was what Epic wished they made and will probably copy in the future. Mass Effect 3 is really about whether Bioware has the balls to keep pushing that forward and the talent to keep everything in line.

Yet everything I read about Mass Effect 3 has me scared. Developed characters in the previous games seem to be tossed aside, their motivations flimsy at best. RPG mechanics are being thrown in left and right, seemingly a knee-jerk reaction to the second offering’s “fan” reception. 

Expectations are too high for this one, there is too much added and changed that Bioware risk removing or drastically altering the core of what made Mass Effect 2 so beloved. And I don’t think it could be repaired. This is the only game on this list that I am scared will fuck up, because it needs to be almost perfect to succeed.

Status: Released

(Source: youtube.com)

20.02.12
#7 - Torchlight II
I’m going to spoil a bit of the upcoming list here: There is no Diablo III. So if you hate me for that, tough. I do want to play the game, but I just am not excited about the changes Blizzard is making to the franchise. Also, I’m not entirely convinced the game is going to be out by the end of the year. Yeah, they had a beta 6 months ago, but stranger thing have happened.
Obviously I would be talking about Diablo in a post about Torchlight. Everything about one is inspired by the other, but Torchlight just seemed like a more enjoyable world to be in. It didn’t require as much time commitment, not only in session length but also in performing menial tasks. It was more straightforward, but still offered sufficient exploration. It was leaner, meaner, and got to the point.
It’s true that Torchlight II seems to be just Torchlight Again, with only minor innovations over the first. Yet the addition of new locales, classes, and especially online co-op, I don’t think playing Torchlight Again seems like such a bad plan.
Status: To Be Released

#7 - Torchlight II

I’m going to spoil a bit of the upcoming list here: There is no Diablo III. So if you hate me for that, tough. I do want to play the game, but I just am not excited about the changes Blizzard is making to the franchise. Also, I’m not entirely convinced the game is going to be out by the end of the year. Yeah, they had a beta 6 months ago, but stranger thing have happened.

Obviously I would be talking about Diablo in a post about Torchlight. Everything about one is inspired by the other, but Torchlight just seemed like a more enjoyable world to be in. It didn’t require as much time commitment, not only in session length but also in performing menial tasks. It was more straightforward, but still offered sufficient exploration. It was leaner, meaner, and got to the point.

It’s true that Torchlight II seems to be just Torchlight Again, with only minor innovations over the first. Yet the addition of new locales, classes, and especially online co-op, I don’t think playing Torchlight Again seems like such a bad plan.

Status: To Be Released

(Source: youtu.be)

20.02.12